Aveti koje volim
Želela bih da budem pozitivna, jaka,žena od akcije.U stvari, sva sam nekako smušena, plačljiva i ranjiva. Ima takvih dana... Treba imati razumevanja i malo ljubavi prema sebi, kad naidju . Treba odmoriti. Pustiti sebe da skupi istrošenu energiju. Oslušnuti šta nam kaže glasić iznutra. Taj glas našeg pravog bića je uvek u pravu. Hoću, hoću, da guram ovu mašinu zvanu život napred . A moje malo unutrašnje ja, kaže:"Stani bre, ženo, je l vidiš da su ti baterije istrošene, je l vidiš da su ti kockice u glavi zbrkane, ne možeš nikud dea kreneš kad ne znaš tačno kuda želiš da stigneš!" Pauza. Nećeš nigde stići ako juriš kao muva bez glave. Ah, da tu je moj verni pratilac, osećaj krivice. Drugima opraštam kad se parkiraju i odmore malo, ali sebi ne. Želela bih da imam snage da jurim 300 na sat. Stara boljka, moja fikcija "super majke" koja uspeva sve. Umorila sam se od dugogodišnje borbe sa vetrenjačama. Otkriću vam svoju tajnu. Potičem iz jako mentalno bolesne porodice. Znala sam oduvek da smo nekako drugačiji, da sam ja drugačija , ali dugo nisam znala da ta naša različitost ima stručni naziv. Godinama se borim za sebe i svoju decu. Obećala sam sebi da ćemo uprkos tla sa kog smo potekli izboriti se da budemo zdravi. Oni su oko nas. To je moja najbliža familija. Nije lako svaki dan se boriti sa avetima koje voliš , koje su ti dale život i prilično ti sjebali isti. Godinama se borim da sve te traume koje smo preživeli ja i moja deca izlečim. Ne odustajem , kažem vam. Samo sam malo umorna. Skupljam snagu. Želim samo sve da vas pozdravim. Eto, olakšala sam malo dušu. Posebno pozdravljam Lunu 71 i zahvaljujem joj se na podršci. Želim s tobom da više komuniciram Luna. Biću iskrena. Moraju deca da me nauče još nekim stvarima. Za sada , samo pišem , znači mi što je to neko pročitao. Hvala. Sve vas voli lastdinosaurus
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